19. Vital Signs and Infusion #2.
My sweet Mom died a year ago today at the age of 96. And what a life she led! A member of a large family, she was orphaned at a young age, her mother dying, her father giving her and several of her young siblings up to the nearby Danish Children's home. She grew to womanhood there, finally moving out into the world where she met my Dad and was married to him within six weeks. They had 13 children together of which I am the 11th. They lost their first, a little baby girl named Ellen, to SIDS. Their 2nd born, Donald, was killed in a car accident at the age of 20. Their 3rd died of Leukemia at age 54 in 1999. They lost their last born, Byron, to an accident as a baby at 1 year of age. Mom lost Dad in July of 2000 after 59 years of marriage, and a week later lost her 10th born, Reyna to breast cancer. And then another few short years later she lost her 6th born, Kathy, dying of a heart condition. Through all of this, my Mom's faith in God did not waiver. She received strength and courage from constant prayer and bible study. She could be socially awkward at times, but the older she became, the more endearing was her manner and the more forgiving her audience.
What are vital signs? I'm sitting in my personal leather recliner on the 3rd floor of the UC Davis Cancer Center receiving some more life-saving poison. My view is similar to last time, a husband and wife to my left, the husband speaking quietly to his wife while she receives her own dose of life-saving poison. They're probably just a little younger than Juli and I. Across from me is an empty recliner, and to the left of that recliner is one occupied by a bundled up human being, blankets, chair reclined all the way, and very thick stocking cap pulled all the way down to the eyebrows, or at least where the eyebrows are supposed to be. Fast asleep, I cannot tell if man or woman, but a young woman is in attendance, probably a daughter, and she is busily typing away on her laptop. From my chair I can see the nurses station populated with a number of very kind and busy professionals, all very attentive and careful to do their jobs correctly and compassionately every single time. I feel like I am in very good hands.
Just now, a half dozen staff members walked into the infusion space clapping and rejoicing, offering the woman next to me a certificate of completion as she is apparently finished with a very long treatment program. She smiles with them as they clap and congratulate her, asking if she is ready to have her chemo port removed, her response a sigh with closed eyes. I pray her recovery is long and complete. I was expecting a pizza.
Next to the nurses station is a big whiteboard with the words "vital signs" written at the top of a grid. It's blank. It is not good for your vital signs to be blank.
Vital signs.
One of my earliest memories of my Mom was before I was school age, and all of my older siblings had gone on to school, so it was just my brother David and myself at home. I remember walking down the stairs in the morning and seeing my Mom's door open a crack, I looked in. She was on her knees with her bible open on the bed, her hands clasped in prayer. She looked up upon hearing me, took me by the hand and had me kneel next to her as she prayed. That was my Mom, and that was the special heritage I was blessed with. As she aged, her physical vital signs became increasingly problematic as is the way of the aged. But her spiritual vital signs remained in the green all the way to the end.
I think that the ultimate vital sign a person can exhibit is the habit of prayer, not something I feel I do adequately, but something my mother certainly modeled well. Orthodox Christians believe that saints who have reposed pray without ceasing in the presence of God, and that they can be asked to pray for us the same way we ask each other for prayer now. If you are aware Mom, please keep praying for me. And tell Dad that the little ding in the front bumper of the green Ford Granada was my fault.
Our bundled up human being across the way has just completed today's treatment and with the removal of the blankets a red and white polka-dotted blouse is revealed. She is released from all the tubes and bags and rises up to leave, holding tightly to the top rails of her walker as she slowly shuffles away, offering a smile to Juli on the way out.
I feel pretty good. The first 1/2 hour or so is spent infusing me with an anti-nausea drug, then the hard stuff is turned on. Again, they watch for an allergic reaction and I pass. Nope, still here... I mean I pass the test. Another hour or so and we should be ready to head home if my blood pressure is low enough. Speaking of vital signs, every time I check my temp at home it is 97.X not 98.6 so we ask the nurse if that is OK. She says it is fine since it is clear that I am naturally cool. She said that and Juli is witness. If only Brad, David, Kenny, Robby, and all my other bullies from 7th grade could see me now.
Today is the first day of chemo for our good friend in Yuba City. Hers was delayed to deal with other complications. She's been at it all day today and says her teeth even hurt. I can't help but believe that her journey is much more difficult than mine.
Please remember our friend MK in your prayers as well Mom.
Oh, and Mom? Remember that time Dad woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of dripping water? And he went into the kitchen to see water literally raining down from the second floor of the house? And then he ran upstairs and discovered the toilet had been running over onto the floor for more than an hour? And as he cleared the clog and cleaned up the mess he determined it to be caused by the failed attempt to flush an empty toilet paper roll? And then he woke up all of us kids and formed a Police Line-up to determine who the culprit was who "flushed the toilet paper roll?" And he failed to elicit a confession? Well, I just want it on the record that when I said it wasn't me, it was because I couldn't figure out who would be optimistic enough to attempt to flush a whole roll of toilet paper! Once I figured out that he meant to communicate an empty roll, we were all back to sleep. And besides he was really, really mad. The kitchen remodel the insurance paid for was pretty cool though, right?
What are vital signs? I'm sitting in my personal leather recliner on the 3rd floor of the UC Davis Cancer Center receiving some more life-saving poison. My view is similar to last time, a husband and wife to my left, the husband speaking quietly to his wife while she receives her own dose of life-saving poison. They're probably just a little younger than Juli and I. Across from me is an empty recliner, and to the left of that recliner is one occupied by a bundled up human being, blankets, chair reclined all the way, and very thick stocking cap pulled all the way down to the eyebrows, or at least where the eyebrows are supposed to be. Fast asleep, I cannot tell if man or woman, but a young woman is in attendance, probably a daughter, and she is busily typing away on her laptop. From my chair I can see the nurses station populated with a number of very kind and busy professionals, all very attentive and careful to do their jobs correctly and compassionately every single time. I feel like I am in very good hands.
Just now, a half dozen staff members walked into the infusion space clapping and rejoicing, offering the woman next to me a certificate of completion as she is apparently finished with a very long treatment program. She smiles with them as they clap and congratulate her, asking if she is ready to have her chemo port removed, her response a sigh with closed eyes. I pray her recovery is long and complete. I was expecting a pizza.
Next to the nurses station is a big whiteboard with the words "vital signs" written at the top of a grid. It's blank. It is not good for your vital signs to be blank.
Vital signs.
One of my earliest memories of my Mom was before I was school age, and all of my older siblings had gone on to school, so it was just my brother David and myself at home. I remember walking down the stairs in the morning and seeing my Mom's door open a crack, I looked in. She was on her knees with her bible open on the bed, her hands clasped in prayer. She looked up upon hearing me, took me by the hand and had me kneel next to her as she prayed. That was my Mom, and that was the special heritage I was blessed with. As she aged, her physical vital signs became increasingly problematic as is the way of the aged. But her spiritual vital signs remained in the green all the way to the end.
I think that the ultimate vital sign a person can exhibit is the habit of prayer, not something I feel I do adequately, but something my mother certainly modeled well. Orthodox Christians believe that saints who have reposed pray without ceasing in the presence of God, and that they can be asked to pray for us the same way we ask each other for prayer now. If you are aware Mom, please keep praying for me. And tell Dad that the little ding in the front bumper of the green Ford Granada was my fault.
Our bundled up human being across the way has just completed today's treatment and with the removal of the blankets a red and white polka-dotted blouse is revealed. She is released from all the tubes and bags and rises up to leave, holding tightly to the top rails of her walker as she slowly shuffles away, offering a smile to Juli on the way out.I feel pretty good. The first 1/2 hour or so is spent infusing me with an anti-nausea drug, then the hard stuff is turned on. Again, they watch for an allergic reaction and I pass. Nope, still here... I mean I pass the test. Another hour or so and we should be ready to head home if my blood pressure is low enough. Speaking of vital signs, every time I check my temp at home it is 97.X not 98.6 so we ask the nurse if that is OK. She says it is fine since it is clear that I am naturally cool. She said that and Juli is witness. If only Brad, David, Kenny, Robby, and all my other bullies from 7th grade could see me now.
Today is the first day of chemo for our good friend in Yuba City. Hers was delayed to deal with other complications. She's been at it all day today and says her teeth even hurt. I can't help but believe that her journey is much more difficult than mine.
Please remember our friend MK in your prayers as well Mom.
Oh, and Mom? Remember that time Dad woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of dripping water? And he went into the kitchen to see water literally raining down from the second floor of the house? And then he ran upstairs and discovered the toilet had been running over onto the floor for more than an hour? And as he cleared the clog and cleaned up the mess he determined it to be caused by the failed attempt to flush an empty toilet paper roll? And then he woke up all of us kids and formed a Police Line-up to determine who the culprit was who "flushed the toilet paper roll?" And he failed to elicit a confession? Well, I just want it on the record that when I said it wasn't me, it was because I couldn't figure out who would be optimistic enough to attempt to flush a whole roll of toilet paper! Once I figured out that he meant to communicate an empty roll, we were all back to sleep. And besides he was really, really mad. The kitchen remodel the insurance paid for was pretty cool though, right?
Well fiddle, I think I signed out before I sent my comments, I will try again.......First of All, Dan, You are looking great !! You look so much like your Dad ! Second, I can just hear your Mom, "Oh Raymond come here and read Dan's confessions" ! They would laugh and say what a good boy you were, then they would kiss & hug...........I never got to know you or David as kids, you were the young boys (yay, boys) !! I was close to Donna, I am a year younger than her........I always loved visiting your family, always something to do or someone to play with ! Sending love and prayers to you and Juli ...... :-)
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