8. Love Like You Mean It

A year ago, when the only thing Juli and I had to worry about was whether or not our business would become a strong and healthy source of income for us or if it would drain every penny, demand that we borrow money to keep it alive, then kick us when we dropped to the ground exhausted. You know, the good old days before Cancer.

Juli and I have supported Family Life Today for many years and believe in their efforts to help marriages and families thrive. One of the things they do to celebrate marriage is sponsor a cruise to the Bahamas every year for married couples only, called The Love Like You Mean It Cruise. They take over the ship 100% every year and it includes Christian speakers and entertainment. Search #llymicruise on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter and check out all the pictures people have posted.

I'm pretty cheap. It is really hard for me to commit to spending money on vacations, especially since I am alone in operating our company. To leave is a challenge since I answer the phone, emails, do the shipping and receiving, etc... But a cruise? One that Juli has mentioned many times as a dream? Finally I decided that whatever had to be done with the business could probably be figured out and I pulled the trigger, signing up for a Stateroom on Deck 6 of the Carnival Conquest with a balcony. Then, I gave it to my Sweetheart for our anniversary. And her birthday. And my birthday. And probably Christmas.

We prepared by getting her passport lined up since she didn't have one yet, new luggage, window-shopped for clothes, and then December hit with the news that I had cancer. What to do? I hadn't bought airline tickets yet, nor a hotel for the night before sailing so I put those off until we could determine whether or not we could go at all.

One of the issues was surgery vs. treatment and that was based on Stage 1 vs. Stage 4. We remembered the verse: "The path of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, shining ever brighter til the full light of day." We could not see very far down this path, so we simply put our faith in the One who does know and waited patiently as the diagnosis unfolded, as the gleam of dawn brightened the path ahead.

When it became clear that it was too late for surgery, the upside was that there would be no extended recovery period and the treatments and chemo could be coordinated around the cruise. As mentioned in an earlier post, I had met a man named Rollie through the UC Davis Peer Navigator program and in my conversation with him discovered that he and his wife go on cruises on a regular basis. He informed me that UC Davis had always considered treatment schedules secondary to quality of life schedules so he would book a cruise, and UC Davis would work around those dates.

Our oncologist agreed and as it turned out, the timing of the cruise was after the Lupron injection was scheduled and before the optimum wait for chemo. She wanted me to experience a period of time with Lupron to understand how it would effect me. If chemo happened right on the heals of Lupron, we would not know which one was making me experience which side effects. So the cruise was on.

On Friday the 9th of February, a good friend picked us up at 4AM for the ride to the airport. Justin would have to be a good friend to pick us up that early! We boarded a plane bound for Dallas, Philadelphia, then Ft Lauderdale, landing around 7:30PM. I like to fly, and I'm cheap, so the up/down flight was an adventure for me. Juli? Well, anyway, we got an Uber ride to the hotel, ordered dinner delivery, and settled in for the night. The next morning we took our time getting ready because our boarding appointment at the ship wasn't until 12:30.

Getting another Uber in the morning, we loaded into a Camry being driven by a tall young man from Haiti with KLOVE playing on his radio. We enjoyed a great time talking with him as he described meeting his wife in Haiti, moving to the US, getting married here, going to school, and driving an Uber cab to help support the family and pay for school. At one point I asked him about hurricanes since this past year had some strong hits in the Miami area. I was sobered by his response as he described "getting tears" whenever hurricanes come because he knows his family in Haiti often loses possessions and even has injuries. I love storms. But most of the time in this country there is little damage or lots of help compared to a country like Haiti.

We arrived at the ship in plenty of time even though he drove the long way to wait at a Starbucks while I ordered morning coffee. (Yes - I gave him a nice tip) 

One of the side effects of the Lupron injection is nausea or maybe just queasiness, as well as headaches, hot flashes, and fatigue. Juli and I were a little concerned about being in an airplane for a long time and how I might react. I was uncomfortable at times, but generally came through it well. Now we were going to test that on a ship on the ocean, and neither of us had ever been on a cruise before.

Once onboard we had to wait a bit for our state room to be ready, but once it was, we were really excited. It was beautiful, comfortable, and we were so thankful after everything we had been through so far just to be there.

As longtime supporters, we received an invitation to a "Bon Voyage" party in a lounge that would basically be a meet and greet with Dennis and Barbara Rainey, the young couple taking over for the Rainey's as they retire, (David and Meg Robbins) and some of the entertainers who might also come. For a year I had known that Plumb would be on the ship, and I am not ashamed to say that she is a favorite singer/composer of mine and I was really looking forward to hearing her perform.

Sometime this past year, Tiffany (Plumb lead singer) and her husband Jeremy were interviewed on Family Life Today and their story is an incredible story of romance, destruction, and redemption. It is worth the listen when you have time. As it happened, Tiffany was seated near us as Dennis Rainey spoke and introduced his wife Barbara and David and Meg. When time was up, they asked for prayer, so both Tiffany Lee and Brandon Heath went up to the stage to pray for them. It was over, people started filing out, and Juli and I hung back hoping to say hi to Brandon and then to Tiffany. As it worked out, we chatted with Brandon for a few minutes as he described being in Yuba City several times as well as spending time up at Woodleaf, a popular youth camp near us in the mountains. Then we waited as Tiffany finished a conversation with another gentleman.

As she turned around and greeted us, we enjoyed a couple of minutes of small talk as we described our respect for her and Jeremy and their story. At one point, she brought up cancer in a list of things people have to deal with in their lives and of course that opened the conversation up regarding my diagnosis. There is such a difference between entertainers who entertain with the label "christian" and strong, beautiful christians who have been given the gift as a way to serve Jesus. Tiffany spent 20 minutes or so with Juli and I listening to us and encouraging in return, finally wrapping us both up in her arms and praying an incredibly heartfelt and meaningful prayer. In the middle of the prayer, we found ourselves wrapped in the arms of another young woman, the wife of a contact person from Family Life we had been getting to know by phone for several years.

God's people. Leaves on the tree, healing the nations one couple at a time...